After listening to the President’s address (or not in some cases for those who decided to skip it), members of The Democratic Party decided that one rebuttal was not enough.
In keeping with the division theme, The Democrats are planning six rebuttals to Trump’s first official State of The Union address.
The Daily Wire’s Emily Zanotti provides a helpful guide to all of them… just in case you’re in the mood for more long-winded speeches to explain just what the ‘issues’ really are…
The Official Response: Right after Trump’s speech concludes, the Democrats will try to convince voters that they are more in touch with issues affecting the “real Americans” who populate “flyover country.” They will do this with a speech from, Sen. Joseph Kennedy III, a third-generation Senator from America’s most notable “royal family,” who will give his rebuttal from a coastal hideaway in Massachusetts.
The Spanish-Language Response: Virginia Delegate Elizabeth Guzman will give the Democrats’ “Spanish-language” response, despite the fact that she is not yet a member of Congress. Guzman is one of ten Democrats who were swept into the Virginia statehouse in a landmark victory in 2017 — quite the feat — but she isn’t exactly ready to help the Dems connect with average voters. She may be best known for quipping to the Huffington Post that, “We cannot be centrist any more.”
The Bernie Sanders Response: Not to be outdone by a freshman lawmaker, Vermont Independent Sen. Bernie Sanders will deliver his own State of the Union response, but unlike his Democratic colleagues, Sanders will not deliver his remarks from a prepared speech. Rather, he’ll respond on the fly, largely from a set of talking points he’s already released. Expect plenty of conspiracy theories starring the Koch brothers.
The Socialist Response: Wait! Were you concerned that Bernie Sanders would demand enough free stuff in his rebuttal to Donald Trump? Well, then, you’re in luck, because the Working Families Party, which considers itself an “independent minor party” pushing the larger Democratic Party to the left, will fill in the blanks with their response to Bernie Sanders’ response to Sen. Joe Kennedy’s response to Donald Trump.
The Maxine Waters Response: In a fair world, Maxine Waters’ State of the Union response would just be “IMPEACHMENT” scribbled on a poster board. But because she’s booked on BET, she’ll give a heartfelt argument for booting the President from office based, largely, on a set of imagined criteria, and what she feels are personal insults.
The Celebrity Response: This happened on Monday night, so you won’t be able to catch it live, but if, after all of this, you still feel the need to experience yet a stranger version of a State of the Union response, Mark Ruffalo, Michael Moore, and others, including the “artistic directors” of the Women’s March, have put together an excruciatingly long video from their “People’s State of the Union” event, calling for “resistance” and a host of economic policies that will never impact them personally.
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We suspect by the end of all these, the results will be summed up as follows…